A lady client comes in with her 14-year-old daughter and promptly accuses her of being a slut and a whore, because of the way she dresses, and the way she acts. After only a couple of inquiries everyone becomes aware that the daughter simply dresses the way most 14-year-old girls dress, and she has never had sex.
I absolutely believed the daughter. So this tells me that the mom must be projecting her issues onto her daughter (what’s that about me/mirroring). After some more guided questioning the mother admitted that, in her upbringing, she had to dress extremely modestly and conservatively. If her father saw anything other than that, there was hell to pay. She also was not allowed to date. The point here is that she wanted to be a slut/whore, but because of her father’s influence never allowed herself to be that.
The mom also identified that even though in her current adult life she is not your typical “whore,” she does readily admit that she is a gold digger, and no men get any pussy until they buy her many dinners, jewelry, take her on trips, occasionally even buy her a car, etc.
At that moment, it was as if a miracle had happened. The mom was touched and went to a place of humility, fully aware what the real issue now was. The mother was actually projecting onto her daughter her own unresolved promiscuity issues.
